Losing Touch With the World

Today was Day 1 of Week 2 in “My Kid Is Better Than Yours Hell.” For those of you that don’t know what I am talking about because you haven’t been keeping up on my blog lately, every summer there is this crunch time in which all of the extra-curricular and other community activities we want to do fall at the same, damn time. Every day is a long and arduous march of activities – shuttling from one thing to the next until the end of the day where I collapse in utter exhaustion.

Today, though, I took it a little more easy through the death march and took a look around, as well as at myself. In doing so, I realized that we all seem to be losing touch with the world.

#1 Facebook Bullying

I’ve said it once before and I’m going to say it again: I am so sick and goddamned tired of people that are Facebook bullying it makes me, well … sick. You know what I’m talking about: that person that posts a status update or an eCard they thought they were so clever to make:  it’s Facebook, not your diary. People that make fun of or put down other people are bullying. They’re judging. And they’re saying “I am the standard by which other people should judge their actions.” All of this is just a little out of touch with the way the world really is.

Yesterday I saw a friend had taken it even further when she posted a picture of two people she saw on the beach – a man and a woman, both of which were a little frumpy. She included a pithy comment “nothing but eye candy here today…” and I immediately lost every ounce of respect I had for this woman. She is so out of touch with the world it is astounding. To think a woman in her 30s is still sitting around judging the way people look – and then talking about it – is a little sickening.

#2 Motherfucking Octomom

I saw some people talking on Twitter last week, and then again on Facebook, about how Octomom is now turning to stripping to make some money. Or was it porn? Who cares what it was, what is out of touch with the world were people’s responses. People are saying she is a bad mother because she is stripping. People are saying that child services needs to get involved.

To begin, Octomom stripping to pay the bills is a good thing. The very people that are criticizing her for using the system to pay for her many children are also the ones complaining now that she is trying to support them. Even if she uses some of that money for herself – whatever the case may be, if she is working, she is working.

To continue, Octomom has been center stage for some time now. Every time I hear or read someone say “can we please have a child services intervention?” I think this person must be a complete moron; because only someone terribly moronic would not realize that child services has known about Octomom for some time now and has no problem with her.

Do you know why child services has no problem with her? Because there are a lot of mothers in this world with that many children. Single mothers, no less! Single mothers that strip to pay the bills!! Gasp!! Because she is not actually harming the children – she doesn’t do drugs, she isn’t abusing them. She’s stripping – something probably millions of mothers before her have done. This has been going on for decades in this country, alone. Why everyone acts as though Octomom is any different than your average, uneducated, middle-aged woman in an unfortunate position is beyond me.

#3 Breastfeeding in a swimming pool

And then today I saw that one of my friends had commented on some article about some lady that got kicked out of a public wading pool for whopping out her tit and squirting her boob juice at her 10 month old kid.

The article begins “It’s never a good sign for society when a breastfeeding mom is told she has to stop nursing in public because some prude has their panties in a twist.” The writer of this article, the publisher of this website, and every idiot that agrees with this sentiment and the plight of the woman who breastfed in a public swimming pool have clearly lost touch with the world.

That’s right, I did say “every idiot.”

I am all for breastfeeding if a woman decides this is the best course for her and her baby. I’m all for public breastfeeding, as long as it doesn’t get on me. I do not believe that a woman should be forced to go in a bathroom, or in the car.

But I also know that it’s never a good sign for society when we have forgotten the very real dangers of disease. HIV and AIDS are transmitted through breast milk, as well as a number of other bacterial, viral, and fungal agents. If that mother had spilled some of her milk into that pool, while the chlorine may have killed it, it also may have not. The people that asked her to get out of the pool to do the feeding were doing nothing other than exerting their right to protect themselves from someone else’s bodily fluid. This is a matter of basic hygiene, and I’d have to argue that it’s never a good sign for society when such things are being overlooked for the sake of proving a point.

 #4 “My Kid Is Better Than Yours Hell” Tennis Dads

Remember last week when the tennis dads (I called them SOAPS – Summertime OverAchieving Parents) almost got into a fight over whose daughter was more into watching Wimbledon? Well, this week one of the dads did not return; the other brought his daughter 15 minutes late. When they walked up he said “sorry we’re late, but I think we all know Katelyn doesn’t need lessons.”

Are you kidding me? This guy’s arrogance is off the fucking charts.

A little later it was revealed that he had spent an assload of money on a new, adult-sized tennis racket for his six year old daughter. The coach gave her a kid’s-sized one to borrow since the big one kept falling out of her hands and the dad started screaming about it.

I realized at this moment that the only one in touch with the world at these tennis courts was Coach Harvey, because he said something so wonderful and amazing I am still grinning from ear-to-ear: “perhaps if you worried less about your daughter becoming a pro and more about helping her learn to actually hit the ball things would go a little smoother here.”

Fuck yes.

#5 The B(itch) is losing touch with the world

And last, but certainly not least, it appears that I am even losing touch with the world. No, I am not posting as a bully on Facebook, and I’m certainly not breastfeeding in a swimming pool.

But I am losing touch with everything I love. Since I got home from vacation in April, life has been something of a downward swing. I’m homesick. I miss my family. And a lot of my hobbies and interests seem to be dwindling.

Even my blog is losing its fanfare. Last week I posted about an upcoming video blog series I want to do, and an unprecedented number of people – people I called friends – said they were not interested. Really? REALLY? That’s the last fucking time I ‘like’ their pages, or share or support their causes. A lot of people said they were interested too, and I plan on doing it in the future … but not until I figure out just how and why I have lost touch with the world a little myself.

My general readership is dwindling too, which seems odd since nothing in my blog has changed, save for a little design changing here and there. The most popular thing people seem to come to my site for now is donkey pornography. I haven’t ever been able to get more than a small amount of Facebook fans.  Contrary to popular belief, I’ve done everything the so-called experts say you should do: I published an eBook for my blog, utilized my personal network, I hosted a giveaway. And yet, the more I try the more I seem to lose touch with the world (the blog world, that is). I Googled it. I asked around a little. So far, I can’t seem to get a straight answer.

Although while I have retreated into my shell just a little bit more than I was before – both in my online life, as well as my in-person life – I at least have comfort in knowing I haven’t lost touch with the world like tennis dad or the people that rail on about Octomom. I’m not popping out my boob in a swimming pool to leak my bodily fluid everywhere. At least I haven’t lost it as much as them. I don’t think I ever could.


  1. The Top 5 Bloggie Blog Blunders | B(itch) Log

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  2. cheryl

    Sorry but I feel breast feeding is a private thing. My daughter has a 5 month old baby and she either takes a bottle with her or goes to the dressing room of a store to nurse her baby. I’ve seen women feeding their baby with discreation with a light receiving blanket over their arm.

    1. Heather Christena Schmidt

      Personally, I would just pump and put it in a bottle for use in the public. If a woman is comfortable with nursing in public, fine. But when it comes to my or my kids’ personal safety (breastfeeding in a public pool where her bodily fluid can be mixed with the water we are in) … that crosses the line. Thanks for your comment!!!

  3. cjackplay.wordpress.com

    As far as the blogging goes I try to look at it from a one is better than none P.O.V. I can never tell what people will want to read, though anything provocatively titled seems to make them take a gander for at least a half a minute. Maybe it is the summer, as an earlier poster guessed.
    As for the rest I don’t think people are getting more out of touch, but more just not caring if they offend anyone. Since the door has swung so far open with all the new social media outlets people seem to be much more honest about their thoughts than perhaps they should. We are more connected and yet more disconnected than ever. Deep thoughts to ponder. Great now I’m going to have weird dreams. Well, weirder. 🙂
    Here’s to hoping you get to see a SOAP dad get hit in the balls with an errant serve. 🙂

    1. Heather Christena Schmidt

      I think I agree with you! People don’t give a shit. I’m writing a post for tomorrow about this guy that belched like a pig at Johnny Rockets today! Right there! Totally didn’t give a fuck about what was going on around him..

      1. cjackplay.wordpress.com


      2. Heather Christena Schmidt

        I know. I KNOW!! Hahaha

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  5. paralaxvu

    I’ve noticed less posting,too, and less likes (although that could just be what I post that folks don’t like), and I’ve decided that sometimes when one particular blogger goes off the air for a while for whatever reason (illness, moving, vacations, etc.) a lot of others who followed that blogger tend to stop blogging too. Cuz that one blogger is maybe extra good and has lots of readers. I realized that I went on WP looking for a particular blogger and when that blogger wasn’t posting anything I was disappointed, sometimes to the point that I just went offline and didn’t post myself. So perhaps that’s happening, too. Who knows? It’s the blog world. It’s people. Perhaps it’s a full moon. A blue moon. A harvest moon. It’ll pass, my dear. Or, it won’t;-)

    1. paralaxvu

      Hey, I just got a post that might help you: http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2012/07/17/ebbs-and-flows/. Maybe not, but I thought it worth a try…

      1. Heather Christena Schmidt

        Thanks so much!! I read it and am taking heed 🙂

    2. Heather Christena Schmidt

      Good perspective! Also, maybe the summertime is having an effect.

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  7. rich

    hmmm. snapping pics of people on the beach and posting them. that’s not right. not if you’re making fun of them. what about taking pics of people you admire and posting them, saying, “wow she is beautiful”? or taking pics of women and then going home and jerking off to them. oh, i mean, just admiring their beauty. yeah, that’s what i meant.

    i think soccer parents might be worse than tennis dads because the soccer parent has 10 other kids they can blame for why their kid didn’t score. all the other kids don’t pass well. they’re jealous and won’t pass. all that crap.

    i didn’t see the video post, so i’ll have to go look for it. i haven’t seen many posts at all lately from anyone and am catching up this week. i hope.

    as for breastfeeding, a great friend is one of those moms still feeding her 3 1/2 year old kid. she’s very militant about it, but she’s calming down. i’ll have to see what she thinks about the pool thing.

    1. Heather Christena Schmidt

      Hahahaha, I agree with you – if you see something as an inspiration, by all means snap a pic. But doing it to make fun of complete strangers? That’s just rude. It’s funny you mention soccer parents because tennis dad was talking to another parent later in the lesson and saying he was going to try and get his perfect daughter to try out soccer because it’s a “family sport” and he really prefers the feel of the family sports. I don’t even know what the fuck he was talking about with that family sport shit, to be quite honest.

      I’m interested to know your friend’s feeling about the swimming pool thing. I don’t even really think it’s a conversation about breastfeeding, really. It’s a conversation about basic hygiene and who you have a right to expose your bodily fluids to. What is such a big deal about just sitting on a pool deck chair for the 10 minutes it would take to feed the kid?

      And I appreciate you looking for the video post; I’m going to do it just later than planned. I really was actually directing my frustrations about that to actual friends. Friends that have gotten donations from us for their marathon runs. Friends that have asked us to “like” pages for their girlfriend or vote for their kid in a Gap Cute Baby Contest. Friends that I have known all my life saying “no” to supporting my endeavors in the same way I support theirs. At the very least, they could just say “yes” and not do it. Jerks.

      1. rich

        cute baby contest? oh, i want to piss on them.

      2. Heather Christena Schmidt

        Disgusting, isn’t it?! I always get really mad because my friends think I have nothing better to do with my time but remember to go on and vote every fucking day. So dumb.

  8. hecallsmescroogy

    I feel the same way. Just like I’m some hermit. And honestly, I’m kinda okay with that for now. haha.

    1. Heather Christena Schmidt

      Hermits unite!!

  9. batty wisdom

    Write for you, live for you and your family, fuck wimbleton dad (he obviously sucks). You are just fine the way you are. I think in the summer people venture outside more and their schedules are more full. Don’t fret too much, come first frost your blog will explode again!

    1. Heather Christena Schmidt

      Thank you so much for your comment! I agree it being summer – at least I hope 🙂

  10. Kanerva

    I’m in the wrong time zone to join your Vlog. I’m fairly certain my day is winding down just as you’re getting started and vice versa… I had the same reaction as Frug re the breasfeeding, until I got to the end of the sentence 🙂 RTFA is always such good advice!
    As for the rest I’m glad the coach is at least on the right side of normal.
    Blogging / FB etc is such hard work. My blogs’ FB page is still in single digits so I’m not about to start handing out advice 🙂

    1. Heather Christena Schmidt

      You are so sweet about the video blog … and to be clear I was really directing that at my friends I have known forever. People that ask for support when they run marathons, donations when they have fundraising drives, page “likes” when they start a new page, and votes when their kid enters the Gap Cute Baby contest. At the very least they could have said “yes, I’ll watch sometime on Wednesday” and just not done it. At least they wouldn’t have been dicks about it.

      I think the tennis coach IS on the right side of normal, which is funny because he is also crazy hahah

  11. Frugalistablog

    Well my dear, I have no idea what to say to make things better. Because that is what I want to do. I can’t figure out the whole blog thing, I write about sex with my husband and everyone comes out of the wood work, I write about something meaningful like helping 3rd world countries and I get ‘eh’ response.
    I didn’t think of breast milk as a bodily fluid. So my knee jerk reaction would be, ‘how dare they ask her to leave the pool, blah, blah, blah, breastfeeding is wonderful. Everyone should be breastfeeding….’ whatever. But when you put it that way, you’ve got a point.

    1. Heather Christena Schmidt

      I don’t even think the swimming pool thing is a discussion about breastfeeding. It’s a discussion about ways to conduct yourself in public when it comes to basic hygiene and bodily fluids. Today as I sat at swim class, I realized that had a mother in a baby-and-me class started breastfeeding right there in the middle of the pool, I would have expelled little Pookie from that pool immediately.

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