So if you aren’t following me on Facebook, you’ve missed some of the fun that has gone on in my terribly mundane life these last few weeks. Most importantly, you missed the part where I had a little bit of a meltdown because Pookies is on this 12 day trip away from me and we are going on 6 days now incommunicado. That, in combination with my general unhappiness with life as is (I want to move back to Chicago so bad I can taste the pizza) led to my husband worrying so much about my mental health that he decided to send me on a three-day jaunt to Solvang.
I’m fairly certain the decision to do so either came because (a) he knew I was about to get a visit from Aunt Flo and would be particularly bitchy in addition to all this other mental drama; or, (b) considered it to be far cheaper than sending me to a funny farm with straight jackets, rolling meadows, and electroshock therapy for a few months.
Okay, I don’t really think I would need shock therapy, but I do feel pretty in a funk these days.
So today was Day One of the mental health fix.
#1 If the fix for a case of the funks is eating and drinking, Solvang is the place for it.
For those of you that have never been to Solvang, CA, it’s kind of like a faux Danish town. It’s in the middle of wine country and the fresh, local, and Danish food is a big attraction. But it isn’t just the Danish food: it’s any food.
Dinner tonight was at Pea Soup Andersen’s, where I had a turkey sandwich and mashed potatoes. Unlike the rest of the people in the restaurant, I ordered my gravy on the side, which I was thankful for because the serving-size was a full crock.
Did you faithful blog followers get that? A fucking crock of gravy.
#2 If the fix for a case of the funks is doing a bunch of weird, bizarre-o shit while drunk, Solvang is the place for it.
There is a lot of Scandinavian heritage stuff everywhere. Every corner has a fucking windmill on it. And Hans Christian Andersen is their town hero. It’s a little weird. A little local-yocally. But it’s good if you need to get away and slow down so your brain doesn’t fry completely.
After rolling into town, I got everything settled into the hotel, which also has a windmill on the front of it. I drove around a bit, made a little bit of a plan for tomorrow, which will include: visiting the Santa Inez Mission, checking out the 34 inch miniature ponies on the pony farm, wine tasting on the Solvang wine walk, going to the Hans Christian Andersen museum, shopping at the All-Year-Long-Christmas store, and making candles in the candle shop. I’m also going to the casino and thinking about getting a pedicure at the nail salon with a large head bust of Andersen himself in the window.
Could this get anymore random?
#3 If a fix for a case of the funks is shopping … well, we all know that a fix for the case of the funks is shopping, and Solvang is the place for that too.
Tonight at Pea Soup Andersen’s, I picked up: strawberry-rhubarb jam, pumpkin pancake syrup, cinnamon honey, wild blueberry muffin mix, and 9 cans of pea soup, tomato soup, and pea-bacon soup. Tomorrow will no doubt include more shopping. My biggest fear is that I just got my TOMS catalogue and there is a TOMS store in town. That could equal major damage to the pocketbook.
I’m heading off to bed soon. Another part of my funk is that I’m sleeping more. I’m considering it a good thing for the moment simply because when my little sweetsies gets back next Monday life will again get crazy in the kid-way.
Heather Christena Schmidt 
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