For those of you that have read my book, listen carefully in my blogs, or know me personally, you know I majored in political science my first go around college. Sure, I hate politics now and this blog is about as anti-political as it could get. But I’m still addicted to what is going on in the world of campaign signs and lawmaking. Why you ask?
Because I really majored in political sexy.
When Joe Biden came out last night after Obama’s acceptance speech, looking like a kid in a candy store, it was all I could do to keep my clothes on. Goddamn, for an older man, Biden is hot.
He’s the number one reason I read The Onion.
While I really and truly commend Romney for his gracious and honorable concession speech last night, I still wish he had kept his family up there with him. Why you ask?
So I could drool over his sons.
He can slip me his Slick Willy any day.
Man that was crass, and Poor Nick really deserves an “oh … poor Nick …” because it’s true.
Most of you are aware of my insane crush on Wolf Blitzer. I bet you didn’t know about my additional crushes, though, on Chris Matthews and Lawrence O’Donnell.
I always tell people I prefer to watch MSNBC because they are usually the most accurate (which is true). But the real reason is because I enjoy staring at Matthews and O’Donnell for hours on end. Last night I went for a record eight.
I’ll never forget when I was still in college and looking for an internship. The first internship I signed up for was for Evan Bayh’s primary presidential campaign, based in Santa Monica. I was helping the fundraising coordinator for the area with miscellaneous tasks a few days a week, and got to go to my first event Bayh would be at within the first week.
That was my last day working for them. I didn’t get fired or anything; I quit because I thought he was so sexy. I wasn’t there to oogle his fine ass, I was there to learn. Years later, I realize I should have stayed. I mean at this point, the degree has done nothing more for me than raise my blood pressure and glue me to the television, while hating how it all plays out and growing more and more jaded about the electoral process altogether.
So I majored in political sexy. Did you?
By the way … don’t be a turkey and BUY MY BOOK! And if you want it signed, just email me for details on how to get that done and shipped back to you for free! Click here, buy book, woohoo!