An Open Letter To My Family, Friends, and Casual Acquaintances

Today marks four weeks since my husband started his new job. Our lives kind of-sort of revolve around his work schedule – well that, homeschooling, tennis, and you know…daily life. … Continue reading An Open Letter To My Family, Friends, and Casual Acquaintances

So I Wiped My Dog’s Butt The Other Night

We are on our annual, fall vacation. No big deal, just a little jaunt to Central Oregon to visit my husband’s grandparents and my great aunt. My husband drove us … Continue reading So I Wiped My Dog’s Butt The Other Night

Well, I Guess I’m Not the Cool Mom Anymore

  Today was the last day of tennis camp. I did not send treat bags for all the kids. I did not bake cookies shaped and decorated as tennis balls. … Continue reading Well, I Guess I’m Not the Cool Mom Anymore

I watched Ricki Lake poop out a baby tonight…

…didn’t see that one coming, did you guys? To be fair, neither did I. But I’m getting ahead of myself. Let me first tell you all about how I got … Continue reading I watched Ricki Lake poop out a baby tonight…

I Need A Babysitter Who Will Work For Free and Not Be a Bad Influence

We used to have a mother’s helper. She came over two times a week, for three hours each time. She’d help with picking up around the house, dishes, lunch, homeschooling, … Continue reading I Need A Babysitter Who Will Work For Free and Not Be a Bad Influence

Can We Just All Agree To Abolish The Term ‘Tween’ Already?

Sometimes I get the impression that my friends that are moms are not really my mom friends. I don’t know if that makes any sense, but people I have known … Continue reading Can We Just All Agree To Abolish The Term ‘Tween’ Already?

Roses Are Red; Violets Are Blue; You Will Die A Terrible, Terrible Death

If you have been around this blog’s block for a while, then you know I watch The Simpsons daily. I’m talking about reruns – we have roughly half the seasons … Continue reading Roses Are Red; Violets Are Blue; You Will Die A Terrible, Terrible Death

It’s Time To Say Good-bye

Well, it isn’t really time to say good-bye. Not completely at least. Sorry, this isn’t actually as dramatic as I made that sound. You guys don’t trust me anymore, do … Continue reading It’s Time To Say Good-bye

Yes, I Judged A Kid Today. I’ll Do It Again Tomorrow.

I am a believer in a lot of things. They range from really stupid things, like what color nail polish is appropriate to wear to a funeral (the answer is: … Continue reading Yes, I Judged A Kid Today. I’ll Do It Again Tomorrow.

So I haven’t technically worn a bra since October…

Ah, where to begin… We went to Disneyland in October. I really hate Disneyland, and what I hate the most is that I have to wear regular clothing for a … Continue reading So I haven’t technically worn a bra since October…

Just When I Thought My 30s Could Not Get Any More Annoying, New Years Eve 2013 Rolled On In

Happy fucking New Years. Seriously. I hope you have a really nice fucking 2014. Eat a dick. That was directed at my 30-something friends, 30-something bloggy people, and 30-something colleagues … Continue reading Just When I Thought My 30s Could Not Get Any More Annoying, New Years Eve 2013 Rolled On In