No Such Thing As Global Climate Change, MY ASS

We’ve been in the throws of a heatwave for three weeks now. It’s more like a heat tsunami. It’s basically hell. We live in hell now. The issue, actually, isn’t … Continue reading No Such Thing As Global Climate Change, MY ASS

I Don’t Care About 3D Mascara, Jamberry Nails, Facials, ITWorks Wraps, or Beach Bodies

That may sound a little harsh. Of course I care about mascara, I wear it often enough to. Not often enough to obsessively buy your Younique 3D lash mascara that … Continue reading I Don’t Care About 3D Mascara, Jamberry Nails, Facials, ITWorks Wraps, or Beach Bodies

The Dress is White and Gold, and By the Way It’s Also the End Of the World As We Know It

If I live a long life, I imagine myself to be like one of those old people in the movies – the narrators, the storytellers. You know, they always have … Continue reading The Dress is White and Gold, and By the Way It’s Also the End Of the World As We Know It

Confrontation At My Local Disney Outlet

I had forgotten how many assholes live in my community. For the last year or so, we have been really swamped. I mean really. Between my father having hip replacement, … Continue reading Confrontation At My Local Disney Outlet

Dear Friends and Family, I Apologize For My Crap Cooking

You guys remember last week I was whining and bitching about how hardly anyone ate my appetizers, which I stated on more than one occasion I would be making and … Continue reading Dear Friends and Family, I Apologize For My Crap Cooking

Just When I Thought My 30s Could Not Get Any More Annoying, New Years Eve 2013 Rolled On In

Happy fucking New Years. Seriously. I hope you have a really nice fucking 2014. Eat a dick. That was directed at my 30-something friends, 30-something bloggy people, and 30-something colleagues … Continue reading Just When I Thought My 30s Could Not Get Any More Annoying, New Years Eve 2013 Rolled On In

Two New Years Resolutions I Will Be Making This Year (Even Though I Don’t Believe In New Years Resolutions)

I don’t believe in New Years Resolutions. Never have. The crux of my argument is simple: if I want to be a better person in X area, I should just … Continue reading Two New Years Resolutions I Will Be Making This Year (Even Though I Don’t Believe In New Years Resolutions)

STFU Fridays: Stop Judging Yourself

If I had a second middle name, it would be self-loathing. I hate myself probably more than I hate other people. If you know anything about me, you know that’s … Continue reading STFU Fridays: Stop Judging Yourself

If I Did Everything The Internet Told Me To Do This Week

Is it just me, or is shit getting real up on Facebook these days? Maybe it’s because I’ve been “liking” more pages lately, so more of their garbage is showing … Continue reading If I Did Everything The Internet Told Me To Do This Week

To All You Jerks Looking For Something To Be Thankful For…

In the previous two years, I’ve made it sort of a tradition to talk crap about people that do that daily thankful post on Facebook. See post one here… See … Continue reading To All You Jerks Looking For Something To Be Thankful For…

This Whole Cat Thing Is Getting a Bit Tiring…

So when I first started blogging, I posted a blog called “Hello, Mr. Biglesworth…” It was a long time ago when I wrote it, and still one of my proudest … Continue reading This Whole Cat Thing Is Getting a Bit Tiring…