So I haven’t technically worn a bra since October…

Ah, where to begin… We went to Disneyland in October. I really hate Disneyland, and what I hate the most is that I have to wear regular clothing for a really long time. Like 9 in the morning until late at night. That is just intolerable. During the week (and on weekends and holidays), I…

I Hope You All Laugh Heartily About My Disastrous Long Weekend

I don’t even know why the fuck I called it a “long weekend.” It certainly was disastrous, but the concepts of weekend, or long weekend, are relatively foreign to me. My husband doesn’t get most federal holidays off. I mean, even when he does he’s usually answering text messages or emails or whatever about work…

I Like The Cold

People always look at me like I’m a complete moron when I tell them that I like the cold. As in cold outside, you know: snow, sleet, wind chill. I get jealous when I see that there are blizzards going on somewhere in the world. I live in California. Particularly, Southern California. We have one…

We’ve Been Watching A Lot Of Documentaries Lately…

… and I’m not sure why. Maybe Netflix is starting to get more lame than usual. I mean they just took Planes, Trains, and Automobiles off the Instant Streaming – just how in the shit am I supposed to watch it at least once a week now? Really I think it’s that we go in…

How This Halloween Has Taught Me to Be Less Of An Overachiever

For the last couple of weeks, I have been totally not feeling it with Halloween. This isn’t normal for me. I’m not like one of those weirdos that obsesses over it all year long, and spends more time and money on decorations and shit than the month’s rent. But I’m still usually pretty gung-ho about…

Miley Cyrus Mom Wars, RIP Agamemnon, and Please Vote For Me

There is no overlying theme of this blog post, really. Just things I need to blather on about, as I sit here engorging on my salad and informing my family about how yummy the sprouts are in it, which I realize is just more proof I’m becoming a California hippy. Before I punch myself in…

Oh, I’m sorry. Did my opinion offend you?

Tough shit. Last week I posted this photo that I found on EpicFail.com of a cat that’s owner had covered it in make up. A few people noted feeling a little disturbed by it. Someone else told me that she hoped a herd of cats mauled me while I bitch. Note that I said “…of…

Two lesbians walk into a frozen yogurt shop…

So I was sitting at Topper’s Pizza today, minding my own business and trying to ignore my father’s incessant complaining and the Pookies whining about this being the last time we eat pizza before we go on vacation (have to clear our pizza palettes of the crap we have here in California before heading home…

STFU Fridays: The Letter Of The Day Is F

I have had a really horrible week. Really awful. Everyone around me seems to be acting like an ungrateful asshole. My spaghetti sauce in the crockpot yesterday got ruined because it was sitting by the sink cooling and someone – somehow – splashed rotten milk into it. And our city is burning to the ground…