The Newsletter: Issue #13

Welp, it isn’t Friday the 13th, but it’s Friday and this is newsletter issue #13, and I also am pretty sure I saw a ghost yesterday, so let’s call this all a sign. A sign of what though? Not sure.

We’ll get to the ghost in a minute…

Around the World

So … monkeypox, huh?

Monkeypox has largely taken the stage, while COVID and its variants continue to absolutely ravage the world. The United States has more than 7,000 cases of confirmed monkeypox, with too many more than that suspected to count. As usual, we never learn from our mistakes, and are making the same ones we made with COVID. Among them have included stereotyping a group, being slow to act, and allowing misinformation to rule the public sphere.

We just do not ever learn from our lessons. Frankly, it’s embarrassing at this point.

On the note of lessons and never learning, COVID transmission around the United States remains at remarkably high levels. The vaccines are slow to be updated, and a 9/11’s worth of Americans continues to die every week against a disease that we know how to deal with at this stage. At least half of them from states reporting are in people fully vaccinated – the vaccines need updating, and urgently.

And yet, of course, economic interests come first, and so the CDC is moving to decrease mitigations even further, at the same time that they just released a report on the long term health effects of unfettered COVID infection in children and adolescents. Spoiler alert: it ain’t pretty, and will – I believe – go on to be among the largest marks of shame modern America has to bear.

Nancy Pelosi spent $90M of your taxpayer dollars to take a trip to Taiwan. I’m still unsure why that happened. And basketball player Brittany Griner was convicted and sentenced to 9 years in prison out in Russia.

Great times, amiright?

Around My World

So my big news right now is that I’ve started a podcast! I’m pretty excited, and you should be too – that is if you can tolerate the sound of my caustic and irritating voice.

I’m still working out the kinks, so if you do have a listen and have any thoughts or ideas, shoot me a message and give me your thoughts.

You can get a new episode every Monday on your preferred podcast platform, it’s on all of them. And in the days that precede that, the episode is loaded to YouTube where you can also listen to it in full. Your choice, let me know what you all think.

To that end, here is next week’s episode, available now on YouTube… or you can wait until Monday to listen to it wherever you listen to your pods.

You Can’t Unsee This

Have any of you seen the Dark Brandon memes? I still don’t understand them, one bit; and yet, they’re hilarious.

It probably only makes it more the strange that a few days after they went viral, a lightning strike injured two people and killed two others right outside the White House. Now I’m not the biggest believer in heavenly things (as with me and everything: it’s complicated), but y’all need to start paying attention to the Lord already.

STFU Fridays

Last night, it was very loud in my house and my husband was working late. My 5 year old could not get calmed down so as I always do when this comes up, I took him for a drive. He knocked out in a matter of minutes, but when I pulled into my driveway I decided that I should sit and wait a few just to make sure he didn’t wake back up when I carried him in.

I put the car in park and grabbed my phone, then looked down at it and immediately saw a white figure move rapidly right past my car window out of the corner of my left eye. No one was in my drive, on my street when I pulled up; so at first I thought it was one of my kids.

But the hairs on my neck were standing upright, and I got chills. So I texted my kids, because I thought: what if someone was trying to break in? They confirmed it was not either of them, it wasn’t my husband and wasn’t my dad… and the security cameras we have around our house showed no one.

To make things all the more creepy, when I got out of the car, it smelled strange. Like a dentist’s office – like the gases that you can smell when you walk in as you hear drills running and dental bills racking up rapidly.

So I’m pretty sure it was a ghost.

Naturally, I took to social media to share my story, and I told everyone in the house. The consensus was that I was full of shit: either I’ve gone insane, or am heading there. All of that may be true, but the insulting ones were the people saying I was just making shit up.

Well to all of them I say: shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up with your skepticism that a world beyond exists, or questioning the validity of my otherworld encounters. The same as the existence or lack thereof of some omnipotent being striking the White House with lightning is no more disprovable than it is provable. You find out when you meet that ultimate human destination – we all do; everything until then is speculation. If we can believe in good vibes and prayers, it stands to reason we can believe in an afterlife where some resonating energy of people persists. Even if it’s just that: energy.

If anything this is a sign that Spooky Season is just around the corner, and I for one am ready.

The Newsletter: Issue #8

Well anyway, we are getting settled in our new home. I hesitate to call it a home, because when you do that you get attached and if I learned one thing at our old place it’s: do not get attached. Nevertheless, we are settling in at least for now. We aren’t sure how long we’re going to stay here, but we’re making it work in the meantime.

World’s still gone crazy while my move was going on, so let’s get to it.

Around the World

Okay folks, so y’all decided to fuck around with loosening of COVID precautions, and now we are all going to find out.

Cases in other places of the world – in particular Southeast Asia, Europe, England and Scotland, and Canada – with the new sub variant of Omicron BA 2 are exploding, but what is particularly alarming to me (beyond the US again thinking we’ll go by unscathed) is that hospitalizations in some of those countries are at their highest points of the last two years. This is not good. With symptoms more severe than Omi 1, absolutely no prior infection with Omi offering protection, an R0 estimated by some between 22 and 38… and no one – and I mean no one – giving a literal shit whatsoever about any of us… welp friends…

What’s so chilling for me is that corporations and the political elite have completely ripped off the veil. Like really, they have shown all the cards in their hand. They do not give a fuck about any of us. At all. They have the tools, so now fuck all of us. Eat Lord Omi and die, right?

Not this lady, if I can help it. I hope you all are taking adequate protections too.

The other thing going on still, obviously, is the situation with Ukraine and Russia, but there are two things about that I would like to highlight:

First is that the Democratic Party has failed to fund COVID, has failed to secure any social programs – including the continuation of the Child Tax Credit, failed to fulfill campaign promises (in particular that student loan forgiveness one), and has, for the most part, failed to adequately protect us from whatever COVID had to offer… but now they’re all contemptuous of us all for (rightfully) asking just what in the fuck they’re doing for us, while they send literally billions in aid over to Ukraine.

This is and has always been my problem with the Democratic Party: they are elected to do very clear and specific things, and they instead do what they want (which also happens to not be those specific things). They were elected to deal with COVID, provide the working class a better quality of life, and address voting rights and systemic racism. Instead it’s economy, police budgets, and military spending that comprises more than 50% of the entire fiscal year budget.

Think about that for a second. 56% of the budget is for military drones and soldiers to fly around in jet packs. The other day, whatever dumbass is running Biden’s Twitter account tweeted something about how his father always said that to know a man’s priorities, look at his budget. Fucking shooting people and playing big dick around the world as a military superpower appears to be this administration’s priority. The people? Fuck us.

Now I suppose I need to preface this by saying that I totally and completely support helping Ukraine and, by extension, keeping America safe. Putin is a monster, and the war was totally unjustified (in my opinion all war is – for the most part – unjustified); and we are in a pretty scary moment of world history, what with fascism rising all over the world. Nevertheless, it is fair to ask why the American people are being asked to sacrifice, struggle, deal with rising prices brought on by sanctions, and watch billions and billions of our tax dollars being sent overseas, when we can’t even get any fucking healthcare. My daughter needs an MRI on her knees right now, and our share of cost on our insurance (that we pay $1300 a month in premiums for) is 7% of our monthly take home pay. So sure… do all your military spending and big dick drones and jet packs and shit… but can you throw us a fucking bone too? Anyone?

To make matters on this worse: today, a study showed that the sanctions have actually not even done anything to harm the relationships between Russians and Putin. In fact, in his closest circle (the oligarchs)… it strengthened their ties to the country and that fascist fuck. So basically bread and pasta now costs half your paycheck, and you have to wonder how to drive to work tomorrow amidst soaring gas prices from gas and oil company CEOs taking advantage of the situation to make a profit… welp, for nothing.

Well done Dems. Well done. Now, thanks to this incompetence and corruption, the entire world is staring down the barrel of Trump outpolling Biden in 2024 by 6 points. Well. Fucking. Done.

Around My World

Over the years, I have gotten so many requests from people for merch. You guys know what I’m talking about; if you’re reading this, you may even have been one of the people to ask. I’m not talking about merchandise that has something dumb, like my name or my photo; rather has all the dumb shit I say.

So in a couple of weeks I’ll be launching a shop where you can get all of those things on t-shirts and masks and mugs and such. If you have requests, put them in. Here is my favorite one related to the pandemic (but point of clarification: they are not all related to the pandemic):

Other than that, you guys know I turn forty this month. 15 days. I’m staring at it with bags under my eyes and creaks in my bones. Like literally, every year I get more creaky; today I was walking up the stairs and my knees sounded like a bowl of Rice Krispies. TikTok says I look like a teenager, so I guess I have that going for me. Whatever the case may be: it’s coming, and it’s coming fast.

My kids and now my mom keep asking what I want to do for my birthday. Thinking about it is exhausting; but also, all of their ideas kind of don’t sound very fun. Fundamentally, I’ve been a student in higher education for so long that I’ve not really taken any time to identify with my interests beyond that and being a mom for decades. Now that I’m no longer a student, and I’m just a mom, I still need time to figure out what I really am… in to? I just don’t see figuring all of that out in two week’s time.

You Can’t Unsee This

So we live in a duplex. The lady that is attached to ours is a crazy ass bitch; like not a good crazy bitch – like “you crazy bitch get over here and do shots with me.” Like this bitch is so crazy we bought an outdoor security system and named the camera for the front door after her: Christine Watch.

On the other side of our front door, though, is another front door that we share the walkway with. This couple lives in Texas for most of the year, but uses the house when they come to visit their adult daughters. These people are the squarest fucking people I have ever met. The husband’s name is Bert, and I’m pretty sure this guy invented high wasted khaki pants for men. Not even joking.

Bert and Betty’s house had water damage to it, and they’re doing all kinds of mold remediation and renovating as a result. So today the French doors were open and these guys were pulling up the flooring, and I look out my window to see into their courtyard (because the doors are open), and what do I see other than a life-size statue of a fucking samurai.

So Bert in his high wasted khaki flood pants, and Betty with her weekly trips to Applebees with the girls, who live in Texas and only live here (here: a gated community in the town that invented the Karen) when visiting their adult daughters, have a life-sized samurai staring at them from their courtyard in the middle of their duplex. Don’t get me wrong, I think the samurai is really cool. But it doesn’t fit their quilts and mallard duck nicknacks aesthetic, if you know what I mean.

This place gets stranger by the day.

STFU Fridays

Today’s STFU Friday is a little tangential; nevertheless, it’s something that’s been bothering me. People that refer to Trump as “tfg.”

I’m sure many of you are among them. Maybe this is the final straw for you and I, and to that I bid you adieu.

Honestly, though, what is the deal? Is it that you have some sort of PTSD when you hear his name? Is it that you don’t want to give him any more airtime? What is it?

“TFG,” which – for those that didn’t know – is what many people colloquially refer to Trump as, ie “the former guy,” is such a bizarre trend. I get that it’s playing allegiance to Biden, who refers to him as “the former guy,” and so in that sense it’s a cute little Biden fan club thing, but FUCK THAT, you guys.

First of all, I can see that it’s a part of not wanting to give that deranged Cheetoh in a toupee any more airtime, but y’all are failing whether you call him “Trump,” “tfg,” or “Almighty Orange One.” The point is that talking about him but changing what you refer to him as does not change the fact that you are still fucking talking about him, and honestly – really – it’s time to stop. I see all these Biden Stan accounts on Twitter that are fan-girling the President so hard, but at the same time they are bitching and griping about Trump like he’s still in fucking office. He’s not. He lost. I don’t care if he thinks he won; he lost. Focus on the people in power, holding them accountable, and making sure they don’t fuck up (which they are doing while y’all still bitch about Trump).

This is why you are giving Trump exactly what he wants: no matter what you call him, you’re still talking about him. Just. STAHP.

And anyway, it’s not like he’s some super villain with magic powers who grows more powerful the more you say his name. This isn’t Peter Pan where you have to say you believe in fairies for them to be real, and for Tinkerbell to survive. Literally Trump is real whether you say his name or call him The Goya Buttplug Salesman. The more y’all act like calling him tfg will change the very real and certain danger he poses to all of us, the more of a danger he becomes because you are missing the point, and being distracted with stupid, pedantic nonsense.

There’s also this sort of collective trauma I’ve noticed, where we’re all just supposed to be so grateful that he’s not president anymore, that any time anyone points out a failure or flaw in Biden’s policy, or the Democrats at large, a whole slew of “Vote Blue No Matter Who” bros come out of the woodwork, and say dumb shit like “at least he’s not tfg.” Yeah, no shit Debra, we fucking voted for him to not be like Trump, so maybe it’s time to start calling people by their actual names and holding all of them fucking accountable for what they’ve done these last several years.

I don’t know maybe try that.

So to them, the Biden Stans, the hardcore Dems, the people that think saying his name will somehow give him more power… I have to say grow up, and shut the fuck up.

The Newsletter: Issue #6

Oh hey there; let’s just pretend I didn’t bail on the weekly newsletter for something like four months. A lot was going on, and while I posted and was working and writing a lot, I was just a little … well, you guys know, overwhelmed. Delta then Omicron, now Omicron’s cousin. Well, it’s a bit much. I’ve heard so many people, doctors, psychologists, and the like say that no one is OK right now. I would heartily agree. For several reasons.

Nevertheless, here we are and here you are. I’m sure you noticed the new newsletter banner. A lot of new stuff coming at you soon from your girl here. And, as always, I really do hope you and yours are staying safe in these turbulent and, well, fucked up times.

So let’s get to it.

Around the World

Fuckin’ yikes, right?

So it’s looking like Lord Omicron has completely taken over the chat, and even introduced his cousin BA.2. I know these numbers and titles get a little silly and confusing at times, but it’s the overarching theme of “this ain’t over ’til it’s over” is hopefully now abundantly clear to us all.

Perhaps the worst time to go to a war is in the middle of a pandemic. If my history serves me correct, the Spanish Flu weakened the United States military in WWI, at least for a time; so the fact that Biden is now sending troops into Eastern Europe is simply terrifying. I’m wishing I had gone ahead and let my kids do that pandemic project of building us a bomb shelter in the backyard after all.

Secretary Blinken made a statement yesterday that I’d like to hone in on, and I only caught a clip of it on Twitter, which I will paraphrase here: this isn’t about whether or not Putin or Russia trusts us; it’s if our allies trust us. That was when the existential dread and the hope that the paint in our walls is actually lead really sunk in for me, because if I were allies… I wouldn’t be so sure.

The United States government – on several levels – has been exposed for all its weaknesses, and more so insidious underbelly, through out the last two years of this pandemic; and the lying and untrustworthiness is at the forefront, at least as a resident. Can our allies trust us if we have lied repeatedly in the name of things like whether COVID is airborne (it is), where we got our data on masks (many times they made policy without any), and the decision making process of agencies like the FDA and CDC (it’s a clusterfuck)? It’s important to remember that the United States – for better or for worse, and even in spite of Trump – remains a leader in the world, in many ways. Public health being one of them, in spite of the fact that our healthcare system is not nationalized as many countries are; so when other countries have looked to the US for pandemic response, and we just fuck it up with lies and bullshit for two straight years, it’s hard to see us as an agent of utmost integrity on anything.

Couple that with the fact that our president wants to slow dance and sing kumbaya with the GOP that literally does not even believe in the government they are elected to be a part of; while the Democratic legislature has yet to hold anyone accountable for a number of egregious and traitorous acts by high level officials related to the Insurrection… well, you just have to wonder.

So I don’t know y’all. I’m not sleeping too well at night right now, especially since we live nestled between a naval base and a naval air station, and just around 100 miles south of Vandenburg Air Force base (translation: nukes).

Around My World

What isn’t going on around my world these days?

On ultra personal notes: we are moving in April, and if you follow me on Twitter you know this has been an utter gut punch to me and my family. I’ll spare you all the pathetic details, but long story short the owners of the home we’ve treated as our own for years and years and years have booted us out on our asses, in the middle of the worst part of the pandemic, at an inflection point in California’s housing crisis, because… well, there are several theories, but the prevailing one from my biggest supporters back when I ran for city council is: political retaliation.

Perhaps this is the denouement to this city trying to run me out on a rail; just a few months ago we still vividly recall when my son and I were attacked by a maniac running into my car, then following us in his.

But whether the termination of our tenancy was an act of political malice, or simply just a scumbag slum lord with no soul wanting to turn the house for a bigger profit, I continue to ride on.

If you haven’t heard yet, next Tuesday, February 1st my 5 Part Series on running for city council in the middle of said pandemic drops, and I could not be more excited. If you haven’t read the announcement you can do so HERE, or watch the brief trailer down there:

And if you haven’t done so yet, hop on over to Instagram and get in on the Giveaways that I have going next week to celebrate the release!

Other than that I’m just plugging along around here. My daughter turns 18 in less than 3 months, so I’ve been stocking up on brown paper bags to hyperventilate into. My 5 year old’s new thing is to stick things up his butt and then moon everyone in the house; and my 14 year old …well, you know middle children.

You Can’t Unsee This

New feature of our weekly newsletter – and I promise, I’m getting back to doing it weekly again – is something you just can’t unsee. Because if I have to, y’all do too.

This week’s, courtesy of the escalating relationship between the Republicans and Democratic Senators Manchin and Sinema in the Senate (I have my own opinions on whether or not Biden’s Supreme Court pick will become a reality; more on that later…), I present you with The Notebook meme that will scar you for life:

STFU Fridays

I again hate to harp on about the pandemic, but I’m starting to get a real negative vibe on how things are going now that Lord Omi is on the downswing. It’s like the very second that things started to even remotely give the appearance of turning for the better, tons of people called it a win and started popping bottles of champagne in the streets.

There is a profound problem with doing this. Actually several.

First of all, a slow decline in cases, that may even plateau at an alarmingly high level (again, as happened with the Delta surge) is nothing to write home about. It also indicates that an even larger number of people will get infected during the downswing than on the up, just over a lengthier period of time. Some could argue this is positive as it stretches out hospitalizations, but that isn’t guaranteed; especially if y’all start poppin’ bottles and makin’ out in the streets again.

The thing to also remember that in this period of the surge is when the fatalities really start to stack up. We’ve been down this road several times now, all over the world. We know that the fatalities lag; the tragedy is only starting to be felt by the families and loved ones that have and will continue to die in the coming weeks. To be as celebratory and pat-on-the-back about this moment is – in an inevitable phrase – really fucked up.

There are also the calls for the immediate removal of restrictions, even some now from a coordinated terrorist group of physicians that call themselves scholars and experts, some of whom have even talked their way into high positions at otherwise prestigious academic and medical institutions. And look, I’m not a fan of masks; especially the ones needed to protect yourself and others from Omicron (N95, KN95, P100, or the like). But also, it’s really not the end of the world. And to call for kids to not wear them in school when so many children remain unprotected, and thousands of teachers are still at high risk is… well… a bit sociopsycotic.

I understand that we were all promised normalcy back in the summer of 2021. I understand that we were even promised it back in the 2020 election. We were lied to. It’s that plain and simple. So we’re in this DIY pandemic together, and whereas there are still a lot of people that are choosing not to protect themselves, there are even more so that have absolutely no choice to – for a variety of reasons. So we can take one of two paths:

We can err on the side of caution. We can be respectful of the dead and their families, and not go popping bottles of champagne just yet to hold space for them to grieve. We can do our own individual risk assessments, take precautions, and at the same time respect others. As mask mandates lift, maybe keep one in your car and ask the people you are with if they feel uncomfortable unmasked, and respect them if they say “let’s mask up.” We can stay home if we’re sick…

Or we could just throw all the lessons we’ve learned in the last two years out the window, and fuck around so that we can again find out. We can pop bottles in the streets, make out with strangers, go everywhere and anywhere sick, maskless, and refuse to even get tested. We can let our local leaders, state leaders, and federal government continue to slide on managing this like an estimated 6 year pandemic should be managed (with massive surveillance). We could terrorize the public by demanding not only an end to measures for ourselves, but turn it into a culture war where people still taking measures are bullied…

Ultimately, I can already see which way it’s going; maybe you can too. Maybe you don’t mind. But to the people that are calling it over before it’s over, for my part I have to respectfully request that you… wait for it…